For those who are not aware (I know that no one actually gives a hoot) I have been absent for the last week and a half due to my mother going away and taking my laptop with her. Ok fine so she needed it for uni.. But it was probably also a desperate ploy to get me to do some cleaning or whatever.
She left early Monday morning, and so on Monday night a certain someone known only to you as THAT REALLY HOT GUY WHO WORKS AT THE KEBAB SHOP came over and was being very attractive and all.. And this sorta continued all the way through the week. He's so flipping hot.
Uhm.. OK my week was pretty boring, I went out Wednesday night with Kahlee and a couple of her friends for her 20TH BIRTHDAY HA.. And ended up being caught in a very disturbing situation concerning an American and an alleyway. But it was all good and I used my awesomeness to get out of that one. Oh, and please don't think that I'm alluding to the idea that all Americans are alley-loitering sex addicts, either.
Skip forward to Saturday.. I got a call from my very underage cousin asking if I wanted to have a few drinks at my place.. Of course being the alcoholic I am, I could not possibly decline. We got smashed, went for a stroll down the street and somehow ended up in a bar with these 2 guys buying us drinks til 1am. Was a good night. Came home, called kebab guy, had some more to drink and eventually went to bed. Woke up to my cousin and one of the guys from the night before naked on my lounge. It was a more than disturbing image. Very little less disturbing was the trail of blood that followed them from my loungeroom all the way to my bathroom.. And when I went back to look at Brittany her toe and the entire underside of her foot was covered in blood.
Yuck it makes me wanna vomit.
Then I went to the beach and got sunburnt and saw people that I don't particularly want to see in swimmers, then went to the beach yesterday as well and got even more burnt. So all my freckles are coming out--Yay!! I don't care. I love my freckles.
Uhh.. Second installment? I went on MySpace and had like, a band, a comedian and a friend-of-an-old-friend requesting my online phoney friendship. TBH, I swear to God somewhere in my profile says "if you're a band, DO NOT ADD ME." and yet I continuously get bands adding me. Every time, I'm just going to message them and say SORRY BUT I THINK THAT IF YOU ACTUALLY WANTED TO BE MY FRIEND AND WEREN'T JUST FRIEND COLLECTING TO TRY AND MAKE YOUR BAND LOOK COOL EVEN THOUGH ALL YOUR SONGS ARE IN SWEDISH, YOU WOULD FIND OUT THAT I DON'T WANT BANDS ADDING ME. I WILL ADD BANDS IF I LIKE THEM. PISS OFF. Yeah. That sounds good. I think I'll template that so I don't have to write that out all the time. Uhh.. Comedian? You talking about labia reduction surgery for 14 minutes really aint that damn funny. So you can fuck off and stop requesting my friendship, I've already denied you 3 fucking times. And I thought your goal was to meet every JOSH PHILLIPS on MySpace.. Last time I checked, my name wasn't Josh Phillips. Check three being some girl who has small, saggy boobs and insists on taking 20 photos of her in her bra. Why is it that guys like this? If I was a guy (named Josh Phillips) I would most certainly be like.. Bitch get off. That's nasty put on a freakin shirt. I wish I could post photo responses like you can post video responses on YouTube, then I would disgracefully post a picture of myself in the same situation and shut that bitch down like nothing else. Coz she is fooooulllllllll.
Oh shut up you know I love slamming people that take bad pictures, even though I am the cause of the majority of these photos..
Oh and speaking of YouTube (OH HELLZ YEAH SLID INTO THAT ONE NICE AND SMOOOOOTH) I want to give some very honourable mentions to a couple of people who are just totally hilarious.. davedays for one (who has a very unhealthy obsession with Miley Cyrus, does really cool covers of really shit songs, tells pretty good jokes, and has a mad important message for perverts) daxflame is the coolest little (presumably) french kid I don't know.. (He pushes old people in pools, he accidently does things he probbaly shouldn't, like punching kids and stealing iPods, he has a list of girlfriends, he gets over excited, and this is the coolest dax vid ever.) uhm.. there's a whole bunch of other people, like BenLoka is mad with his rhetorical answers, Facebook disses (yay!!) and "on the couch with BenLoka" seshezz. There's some others, but I can't be bothered.
On to the final point of this blog.. I was told strictly before my mother left NO SMOKING IN THE HOUSE AND THE WASHING UP HAS TO BE DONE WHEN I GET BACK.
a) there are cigarette butts and a plate full of ash all around the loungeroom, and the only reason it doesn't smell is coz Kentucky blocks it out. There even ended up being a pack in her room somehow.. Weird.
b) there is so much washing up that I packed most of it into a storage box to soften the blow a bit before she got home then stashed it in the back shed. So far it's worked.. I guess I'll just do what's there then get the other stuff later when she's not looking. It's the perfect plan, really. Except I have heaps of washing up to do.
These things said, I am grounded until ALL the washing up is done and Kentucky's cage is cleaned. I feel.. Betrayed. A girl of my age should not be grounded.
End blog. Geeeeez that took a while.
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